The Portion of my Inheritance

I just love the story that Christine Caine tells of one of her classes at Sydney University. “Her professor projected a picture of a small black dot in the middle of a very big white screen, then asked the class, “What do you see?”

Every student responded to his question the same way, “A black dot.”

He paused then asked the same question again, “What do you see?”

She went on to say that every single student in that class failed to see the big white space around the dot! Their eyes naturally focused on the black dot.”

This is what Christine added to her story:

“The same is true in our lives, and that’s why it is essential that we renew our minds so

we can see the bigger picture. The more we focus on God and magnify Him in our

lives, the smaller the black dot will become.” Christine Caine~Fist Things First

As soon as I read her words I understood the black dot concept. I confess that I am a black dot seeker. I have a hard time taking my eyes off of the dot and seeing the white space with my physical eyes. And it’s a constant prayer of mine, this John 3:30, that He would help me to decrease, and He does it, and it hurts, and my black dot grows bigger.

But like a mad bull I continue to press in, I lower my head and close my eyes and charge, “Lord, help me to decrease so that You may increase!” And once again He does it,and it hurts and the black dot grows bigger, and bigger, and bigger . . . . .

And I cling to the dot until my knuckles turn white, not daring to let go, and the more I focus on the dot, the more I hold onto the dot. The dot increases and the white decrease and my heart grows heavy.

Then I realize that it’s the actual clinging that causes so much pain. The constant prying my hand away rips my heart in pieces in the process of it. “And who will save me from myself?”

In my stubborn and willful nature in refusing to let go, it finally becomes so clear. The more I focus on the white space, the smaller that black dot becomes. My death grip relaxes a bit, just enough to allow His peace to creep into my heart, just enough to see a glimpse of His truth, of His promises. And it is enough.

To actually decrease I must not look to the dot, I must constantly direct my focus on the white space. He is so loving and tender in the revealing, and He refuses to give up on me, to leave me or forsake me, He consistently tends to me, leading me in His way. To live in His truth I must endure the pain of decreasing if I am to have His future of peace and a hope. (Jer. 29:11) It is in the seeking Him, searching Him with all my heart that leads to my decreasing, so that He may increase, so that He may be glorified. So I will continue to cry out to Him, “Lord! Help me to decrease so that You may increase!”

When I truly seek Him, He is absolutely everywhere. Every word I read presses it in deeper, every conversation, every scripture, and every song. So I leave you with one of my favorites.

Watermarks Friend for Life~written by Nathaniel and Christy Nockels:

Friend for life who took my pain
The cleansing flood You remain
Wash over me till I can’t be seen

Living Water swallow me
Deepest River wash me clean
Jesus, Savior more of Thee
Jesus, more of Thee

Come and ruin me with Your love
So no other is enough
Come and leave Your mark on me
Jesus, more of Thee
Jesus, more of Thee

Friend for life I’ll carry on
Through the power of this blood
Let it spill over, over till I can’t be seen

Living Water swallow me
Deepest River wash me clean
And Jesus, Savior more of Thee
Jesus, more of Thee

Come and ruin me with Your love
So no other is enough
And come and leave Your mark on me
Jesus, more of Thee
Jesus, more of Thee

Deep is the stain inside of me
Deeper the River washes me clean
I’ve been the one who cries in the night
You’ve been the Friend of my life

Living Water swallow me
Deepest River wash me clean
Jesus, Savior more of Thee
Jesus, more of Thee

Come and ruin me with Your love
So no other is enough
Come and leave Your mark on me
Jesus, more of Thee
Jesus, more of Thee
Jesus, more of Thee

But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. 24 O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? 25 I thank God—through Jesus Christ our Lord!

Romans 7:23-25